Thankful Thursday

I'm thankful for these dogs! Who are you thankful for?

Today is Thanksgiving. All my kids work retail, so we're trying to fit dinner in between schedules. I'm thankful that the kids are employed, but sad that they can't enjoy time with family because someone must get cheap electronics today. Sigh.

Actually I have many things to be thankful for including a loving family, good friends, a strong faith, decent health, full-time employment, and the many freedoms guaranteed under our Constitution. I am also thankful for the wonderful pets that have shared my life. On this day of reflection I ask myself, was I as good to them as they were to me? Probably not. I've tried -- and I truly believe that they've all had good doggie lives -- but if I can do better, I will.

The following is from The Dog Tricks and Training Workbook by Kyra Sundance. (Regular readers know that I love Kyra Sundance!) I found it thought-provoking and had to share. I copied this verbatim. Enjoy!

You Owe This to Your Dog

Our dogs play a significant role in our lives, whether as working dogs or companions. We've taken them into our household and are responsible for fulfilling their basic and higher needs. For all the joy and companionship they give us, we owe our dogs the following:

• Adequate food and medical care
• A life that is beyond mere survival
• Grooming, ear and teeth cleaning, nail trimming, skin and coat conditioning
• Exercise -- not only the option for exercise, but also the encouragement
• Twenty minutes each day of your undivided attention
• Three enrichment activities per day (a walk, a game of fetch, a training session, a car ride)
• Exposure to the world beyond your backyard
• Socialization with people and dogs outside of your family
• The right to give and receive unconditional love
• Training, so your dog does not become a prisoner of his own misbehavior
• Fresh air and green grass
• Respect for your dog's needs and wants
• Responsible breeding, or none at all
• Time and space all his own
• The freedom to be foolish and silly, and to make you laugh
• The right to earn your trust and to be trusted in return
• Forgiveness
• The right to die with dignity
• The honor of being remembered well

So who wants to be a better dog owner now? Yeah, me too. In addition to Thanksgiving, it's Thoughtless Thursday! We're linking up with Ruckus the Eskie, M.K. Clinton, the pups over at Love is Being Owned by a Husky and all the folks below to share what thoughts are -- or aren't -- in our heads today. Happy Thanksgiving everybody! -- K

Jedi is Three!

Last Saturday was Jedi's birthday. At three, my baby boy in no longer a baby. We had fun celebrating his first birthday with a doggie cake, silly hat and toys. For his second birthday he got another cake, a collar and some fun balls. This year, we're doing something different. We're giving back.

Jedi is healthy, and happy, and has more toys than he needs. To be honest, what he wants is to walk in the woods and pee on trees. The cake and silly hats are for me. This year I bought a hat and was going to make a cake but it felt empty. You see, I discovered that my unofficial mentor has cancer -- again. I feel angry. And helpless. Celebrating in light of this news just felt wrong.

Backstory: When I got Jedi I said I wanted to start showing him. I had a couple GSD club members who showed and thought they would offer assistance. For whatever reason, they didn't. I was on my own. And then Corgi Woman showed up. We had mutual friends. CW had shepherds in the past, so she knew some good stuff. And for some reason she decided to help me. She sent me information, gave me tips, encouraged me. She would look for me at the shows and watch me from ringside. It sound great -- it is! -- but I'm not a special case. I've discovered that CW is always willing to help anyone, anywhere with anything dog-related. She's the kindest, gentlest, most loving person I've ever met. In some cruel, cosmic joke cancer has attacked her three separate times -- yet dog-killer Michael Vick still lives and breathes. IT'S NOT FAIR!

Just before Jedi's birthday I heard about Bark for Life. The American Cancer Society and one of our local national parks have joined together for a FUNdraiser. Participants will take a 1-mile stroll through beautiful Fort Caroline. In honor of CW, Jedi and I signed up. Jedi will get to pee on trees and I get to feel like I'm doing something to help a woman who has given me so much. Here's our fund-raising page. Relax, I'm not asking for money (though we won't turn it down if you fell moved to make a donation). I am asking for prayers and happy thoughts for CW. And if any of you are/will be in the area, please consider joining us.

OK, enough sad talk. It's Thoughtless Thursday! Hop around below and see what others are thinking (and not thinking) about today. Thank you Ruckus the Eskie, M.K. Clinton and the pups over at Love is Being Owned by a Husky for hosting this hop. -- K

Information (Request) Overload

 

When I took over the presidency of the German Shepherd Dog Club, my phone number and email address were posted on the club's website. I knew that was going to happen. What I didn't know was that I would be bombarded by German shepherd and/or dog and/or club questions from complete strangers. I average a call or email every 4 or 5 days. In the past three months I've gotten information requests from:

• The American Kennel Club
• The German Shepherd Dog Club of America
• The Florida Association of Kennel Clubs
• Other local dog clubs
• GSD owners with breed-specific questions
• People without GSDs with breed-specific questions
• People with vague, non-specific questions
• Rescue groups looking for foster families
• People looking for rescue groups
• People with links to dogs in high-kill shelters but don't know what to do about them
• People looking for breeders
• People complaining about breeders
• People looking to get rid of their dogs
• People looking for a veterinarian
• People looking for medical advice without going to a veterinarian
• People looking for a trainer
• People looking for advanced training tips without paying for a trainer
• People moving to North Florida wanting advice about GSD friendly neighborhoods
• People who live in other parts of Florida but can't find anybody locally to answer their questions
• And finally, people actually interested about the club

I also get about two dozen emails a month from club members. All these calls and emails get overwhelming. I answer the questions as best as I can, but I am not a German shepherd dog expert. Neither am I a veterinarian, trainer, behaviorist or real estate agent. That being said, here is some of the answers/advice I've given:

I will not give out anybody's personal information without speaking to them first. I don't care who's asking.

If you are seeking a donation, please send me something in writing and I will present it to the Board of Directors. We will make a decision and get back to you. If you can't wait then the answer is no.

I can answer general breed specific questions. For detailed questions I will refer you to the breed standard and the German Shepherd Dog Club of America. If you have a question about your specific dog, you should talk to your breeder and/or veterinarian.

We are an enthusiasts group, not a breed rescue. We can't take in dogs. I will gladly pass your information on to the membership and they will contact you directly if they can help. Meanwhile, I suggest you contact a bona fide rescue group. I can give you the names of the few that I know personally, but a Google search will give you better results.

I don't feel comfortable giving out medical or behavioral advice. Please seek a professional. I know they can be expensive. I'll give you the names of the vets and trainers that I know, but you should do your own research.

I will gladly give you the names of the breeders in our club. (I have their permission to do so.) I can't guarantee that they will have a puppy when you want one. However, they may be able to refer you to other breeders they feel comfortable with. I will also give you tips and resources for what to look for when selecting a breeder. Best of luck!

If you are unhappy with a particular breeder, you should contact the AKC and the Better Business Bureau. If you're in the state of Florida, I can give you state statutes about the Pet Lemon Law. I am so sorry you had a bad experience. However, I refuse to participate in any breeder bashing.

I would love to tell you all about our German Shepherd Dog Club. I'll give you the link to our website and Facebook page. I would like to personally invite you out to our next meeting and will make sure that you are welcomed by all the attending members. I'll give you the time, date and a Google map to the location, as well as my cell phone number in case you get lost.

So, what do you think? I shared this list with a friend of mine. She had two suggestions:

1. I designate someone to handle correspondence and
2. We have an FAQ page on our website. 

I'm not sure about the first one, but I think an FAQ page is great idea. Unfortunately, I don't have the time (or talent) to create one. I really, really wish we could find a member who not only loves German shepherds but is also a computer guru. Am I asking too much? Do you have any ideas?

 

 

Anyway, it's my (supposed) day off. I've got emails to answer and errands to run. Then I'm going to join Ruckus the Eskie, M.K. Clinton and the pups over at Love is Being Owned by a Husky and celebrate Thoughtless Thursday, where some of my favorite bloggers share random stuff. Click around below and see what others are thinking (and not thinking) about today. Later, -- K

 

A Different Type of Show

All the dog shows I've shared so far are American Kennel Club (AKC) shows. Next month Jedi and I are entering a different type of conformation dog show put on by the International All Breed Canine Association (IABCA). These are more like the European style of dog shows. There are two shows per day (a total of four in a weekend) each under a different judge. Judges give every dog a written critique encompassing 12 different parts of a dog's body and movement.

The entry fees for these shows are a bit higher then I'm used to paying, and since there are four shows in two days its going to be a pretty pricey weekend. However, I'm hoping to get some answers here. Maybe these critiques will let me know where Jedi and I are lacking. Is he not getting points because he's got a bad handler (AKA me) or is there something wrong with his conformation? Depending on the answers we get, we may give up on the show ring and move on to something else like obedience or nose work.

Meanwhile, I just got the judging panels for the shows next weekend. NEXT WEEKEND! As usual, I'm not ready. I need to make hotel reservations, check on my show clothes, double check my tack box, buy bait the ring, practice stacking . . . why do I always go into panic mode before a show?

It's Thoughtless Thursday, so I'm going to just stop thinking about the shows for the day. Instead, I'll hop around below and see what others are thinking (and not thinking) about today. (Thank you Ruckus the Eskie, M.K. Clinton and the pups over at Love is Being Owned by a Husky for hosting this hop.) I'll return to panic mode tomorrow. And as always, if you happen to be near the Volusia County Fairgrounds next weekend, come by and say hello. See you at the show! -- K

Kelley Drinks Because . . .

I love my new t-shirt

• It's illegal to hit people with your truck, no matter how much they really deserve it.
• I haven't mastered the Force Choke yet, but Lord knows I'm trying.
• We keep making laws to protect stupid people from themselves instead of letting natural selection take its course.

(Seriously, if you're not smart enough to know not to use the hair dryer in the tub without the warning label, maybe you should not be a part of the gene pool.)

In case you haven't figured it out, this is a rant. Proceed with caution because I'm in a mood today!

Ah, the Force Choke . . .

One of the drawbacks of being a dog club president as well as an animal control officer is that I get the same frustrating emails to both my personal and professional accounts. There is no "down time." The latest:

A woman says her husband bought her a GSD puppy as a surprise two months ago. She now realizes it was from a bad breeder. Three days after they got the puppy they discovered that it had a stomach infection. THEN they discovered that the puppy has bilateral hip dysplasia (both hips) and bilateral distal femoral osteochondritis dissecans (excessive cartilage growing on the ball joints of both large leg bones). Mind you, the puppy is only 4 months old. The woman wants to rehome her puppy because:

• She can't afford the expensive orthopedic surgeries to treat these problems
• The puppy is going to require life long medications and treatments for what may never be a good quality of life
• They don't have time for a "special needs puppy" (her words, not mine) because her husband works 10 hour shifts, 6 days a week and she works a full 40 hour week, Monday-Friday.
• She's leaving the country in four days and will be gone for two months

All of this was in a badly written generic email addressed to "To Whom It May Concern." (I'm assuming that English is not her first language.) She ended the letter saying that "I need help for him to find someone that will understand [his] needs and be willing to dedicate him a lot of time."

BTW, I have friends in other parts of the dog community and they received the same email. It's a small community. We talk. And since the initial email I've gotten more information. It only made the whole situation more depressing.

I didn't tell Mrs. X my personal feelings. Otherwise, I would have said "Talk to a trusted vet. The most humane thing could be to put the puppy down." I know that may come across as harsh and calloused. Based on the tone of her letter I don't think she would even consider that -- especially since she told one of my friends that her husband paid $3500 for the puppy. (I hope she was exaggerating. Otherwise, she was seriously screwed. I paid much less for the pick of the litter show-quality puppy from a responsible breeder.)

As a club president, I told Mrs. X that we are an enthusiasts club, not a rescue group. We don't have the space, funding or permits to take in animals. I suggested she try searching for rescue groups on the internet to see if one has space and funding available for a special needs dog. I also offered to forward her request to the rest of the Club saying that if anybody was interested they would contact her directly.

As an animal control officer, I recommended she return the dog to the breeder immediately. Florida has one of the best Pet Lemon Laws in the country. Then I took the time to spell it out for her, citing specific sections. Her response was disheartening: "We have 2 party involve and when the real breeder was contacted they didn't return any calls to the other party." What does that mean, you ask? It means that the puppy was bought through an online puppy broker. Yes, they exist. They're horrible. If you only learn one thing from my blog, let it be this:

DO NOT BUY FROM AN ONLINE PUPPY BROKER!!
NEVER. EVER. EVER!

This is what online puppy brokers don't want you to see
-- your puppy's parents!

Despite what the sites may say, these are puppy mill puppies. In the past 6 months, my rescue friends have picked up the pieces from several of these online deals after have gone horribly wrong. The puppies are overpriced, very often sick and unhealthy and the purchaser has no contact with the "breeder" (I use that term loosely.) There is no fair contract and when there's a problem the answer is usually "euthanize the puppy or take it to the pound."

Now that I've had time to calm down -- thanks Ernest and Julio -- I no longer want to hit the letter writer with my truck. I am truly sorry for her heartache. I just wish that her husband had called me and/or read my blog before he bought the puppy. I would have gladly talked to him. We would have discussed:

• Why does want a puppy? Here are nine reasons NOT to get a pet. They should never be surprise presents, especially two months before a long European vacation.
• Puppies take a lot of time and work. Are you sure you're ready? If your work schedule has you out of the house all the time, consider waiting. Until then, volunteer at the local shelter to get your puppy fix.
• Here are some questions to ask before buying a puppy. These are questions for both you and the breeder. Also, if the breeder doesn't ask you some hard questions back, you should be concerned. If you can't speak to the breeder directly, run away!
• Florida has one of the best Pet Lemon Laws in the country. Learn it and use it to your advantage. It can help you weed out bad breeders.
• Are you sure you can handle a German shepherd? They can be a handful. To quote Peter Parker's Uncle Ben "With great power comes great responsibility." Here are 10 questions to ask yourself before getting a German shepherd, as well as some very serious things to consider. I've said many times, GSDs are not Labs, and they're not for everyone. And that's OK.

Instead, Mr. X went out uninformed and ended up with an extremely sick, poorly bred puppy. He thought that by spending more money he was getting a better puppy. (He was wrong.) Mrs. X immediately fell in love with the puppy -- seriously, who wouldn't? Then they threw good money after bad trying to fix an unfixable problem because their hearts ached with compassion and guilt. Now they're trying to assuage their feelings by passing the problem on to someone else, thereby avoiding making "the decision."

I don't know why people do what they do. It's frustrating. I'm trying to make the world a better place for animals and people alike. (Trust me, I don't do what I do for the money!) I try not to dwell on the ignorance/stupidity/apathy/cruelty of others. It stresses me out. I preach, I teach, I pray . . . and I wonder if I'm making a difference or just making myself nuts. Some days I just want to scream. Other days I just cry. And on really bad days I drink and swear. Today is one of those days. So friends, I'm off to open another F***ing bottle of wine. And in honor of Thoughtless Thursday, I am not going to give any more thought to people who don't think -- at least not for today. Talk to later, -- K

What's in a Dog?

When I took over as president of my German shepherd dog club, I said that I wanted to:

• Familiarize everybody with the breed standard, terminology and what makes a GSD
• Get out more with our dogs
• Energize meetings with door prizes, guest speakers and mini-workshops
• Network with other local dog clubs

Well, I'm trying. Last Tuesday was only my second meeting in the big girl seat, so I'm not sure how it's going. The guest speaker I had planned on bowed out, so I had to come up with a Plan B in four days. eek! I thought dog anatomy might be interesting, and a game would be fun. I couldn't quite find what I was looking for so I had to do it myself. I found a drawing of a GSD on the internet. (We ARE a German shepherd dog club after all) and designed the following picture. I had it enlarged to poster size (thank you Office Max), made two copies and then attached the pictures to foam boards. At the meeting I divided the club into two groups and had them race to see who could correctly label their dog first. Here's the picture:

I printed the 18 terms on card stock, and had the numbers 1 through 18 listed under the pictures. Using push pins, members had to match the term with correct corresponding number. Here they are in in alphabetical order:

Back, Brisket, Croup, Elbow, Flank, Flews, Front Pastern, Hock, Loin, Muzzle, Occiput, Prosternum, Rear Pastern, Stifle, Stop, Tail, Withers, and Wrist.

The members had fun and did surprisingly well. (However, I did see a couple smartphones in use).

It's Thoughtless Thursday, so I'm not going to ask you to think about how you would label the dog. Instead, hop around below and see what others are thinking (and not thinking) about today. Thank you Ruckus the Eskie, M.K. Clinton and the pups over at Love is Being Owned by a Husky for hosting this hop. -- K


P.S. You couldn't help yourself, hunh? You played along anyway, didn't you? That's OK, I wouldn't be able to resist either. Want the answers?

1. Occiput
2. Withers
3. Back
4. Loin
5. Croup
6. Hock
7. Tail
8. Rear Pastern
9. Stifle
10. Flank
11. Brisket
12. Elbow
13. Wrist
14. Front Pastern
15. Prosternum
16. Flews
17. Muzzle
18. Stop

So You Want a GSD . . .

I saw this meme on Facebook and it made me giggle, but there's something to it too. I've said many times that German shepherds aren't for everybody. Before adding one to your family you need to ask yourself these 10 questions:

 

How do you feel about vacuuming? 

German shepherds have been lovingly referred to as "German Shedders" because of all the hair that comes out when they're shedding their undercoats ("blowing coat") twice a year. It's enough to make another German shepherd! Truth is, they shed year round, even with regular grooming. You're going to want a good vacuum cleaner. I burned up my vacuum cleaners every other year until I finally broke down and bought a Dyson -- and boy does that thing suck!

Can you live your life with all the doors open?

German shepherds are herders -- it's in their name. Because of this, they want to have eyes on all of their people all of the time. Yes, this includes when you're sleeping and using the bathroom. Jedi hates it when I'm in the bedroom with the door closed while Hubby is in the living room watching TV. He'll whine and scratch and bark until I finally open the door. He's actually learned to open the bedroom door if it's not closed just right. Scary . . . and a tad bit annoying.

How attached are you to your personal possessions?

German shepherds have also been referred to as "German Shredders." They are very good at destroying things, especially during the frustrating adolescent phase. I've shared some of the Jedi's destructive stories, and even threatened to sell him to the next band of travelling Jawas. I've since learned that crate training, mental stimulation and exercise can help contain the mayhem.



Can you live with a dog who may be smarter than you?

Neuropsychological researcher Stanley Coren did a study on canine intelligence. His book, The Intelligence of Dogs, ranks German shepherds as the third most intelligent dog breed, behind the Border Collie and the poodle. While I may disagree with his ranking, I strongly believe that my dog is smarter than most people. Sure, having a super smart dog sounds great, but always trying to stay one step ahead of your dog is exhausting.

 

Can you firmly say "No, you cannot pet my dog" without feeling guilty? 

Let's face it, German shepherds are gorgeous. It's not surprising that people want to touch them. Unlike many dogs, however, German shepherds are not automatically everybody's friend. They need time to check you out to determine whether you're worthy enough for physical contact. Truth is, some people don't make the cut. I am constantly telling people that my dog does not want to be petted today. Surprisingly, some people get down right nasty when you tell them no.

 

Can you listen to a hundred "I was bitten by a German shepherd" stories without rolling your eyes?

This one is tough. It seems that nearly everybody has a bad German shepherd experience somewhere in their past. And when these people see a German shepherd owner, they're compelled to share the story. I listen politely, though I suspect many of them are the afore mentioned people who can't respect a dog's boundaries. Or they could have been dogs with irresponsible owners who ruin it for everybody -- but that's a rant for another day.

  

How do you feel about exercise?

German shepherds are large, active dogs. They were designed to work. If you don't have a flock of sheep that needs herding, you'd better think of something. German shepherds need to run and play daily, otherwise they'll drive you crazy. Trust me! They also need mental exercise in the form of training, puzzles and games. A bored and restless German shepherd will find something to entertain himself -- and you probably won't like it.

Food for thought

Are you willing to accept and/or fight breed-specific rules?

German shepherds are on many "Bad Dog" lists. Some insurance companies won't cover homes with German shepherds. I've heard of homeowners associations that don't allow German shepherds either. I've even seen dog-related Meet-up groups that exclude German shepherds. Stupid bigots. The best way to break these stereotypes is to show the world obedient and well-mannered dogs. That takes a lot of time and effort on the owner's part. If you're not willing (or able) to do it, please don't get a GSD -- you'll only make it worse for those of us trying to make a difference. Please consider getting a philodendron instead.

I have this on a hot pink t-shirt. People still talk to me.

Are you strong enough to resist choking everyone who is suddenly an expert on hip dysplasia and the evils of purebred dogs because they saw a documentary on PBS?

In 2008 the BBC aired a documentary called Pedigree Dogs Exposed. It was controversial and wildly popular. It was also filled with half truths and over exaggerations. I can tell who watched it because they use the term "frog dog" when talking about German shepherds. PeTA has also taken a stand against purebred dogs and continually spouts misinformation. I can always spot PeTA proponents because they like to compare the AKC to Nazi Germany. Other people have been so indoctrinated by the HSUS's "Adopt, Don't Shop" mantra that they seriously believe all purebred dogs are riddled with disease and are inherently unhealthy, despite the fact that science says otherwise. Unfortunately, when you're walking around with a beautiful German shepherd, all these people feel the need to tell you how evil, wrong and/or stupid you are. They're worse than door-to-door evangelists. If it weren't for the point above, I'd let Jedi eat them.

Lastly -- and this is a big one -- are you prepared to have your heart broken in the next 12 years (give or take)?

German shepherds (ok, all dogs really) are great at worming their way into your heart. They're loving, loyal, goofy companions. It doesn't matter how bad the day is, dogs are always happy to see you. They make you laugh, comfort you when you're feeling bad and think that spending time with you is the best. thing. ever! They don't care how much you make or what kind of car you drive. They never hog the TV remote or criticize your cooking. And then one day -- all too soon -- you have to say goodbye. Regular readers know that I started blogging because I had trouble getting over the death of my last German shepherd, Logan. (It's been 3 years and I'm still tearing up just thinking about him.)

 

So there you go, 10 not so tongue-in-cheek things to ask yourself before bringing a German shepherd into your life. If you still say "Yes, I really want a GSD!" I suggest you:

• Read everything you can about German shepherds. Every breed has it's own challenges and nuances, so it's best to be prepared.
• Find/join a German shepherd dog club. These groups of GSD enthusiasts usually contain experienced owners, breeders, breed rescuers/foster parents and dog sport competitors (obedience, rally, herding, tracking, agility, nosework, etc). They are a wealth of information -- and some pretty fun people too.
• If you want a puppy, find a reputable breeder. They're out there. Here's a list of questions to ask before buying puppy. There are some not-so-reputable breeders out there too, so do your research!
• Consider getting an adolescent or adult dog from a GSD breed rescue. There are some great dogs available. Most were dumped by not-so-great people who didn't ask themselves the ten questions above. If you're in Florida, check out Daytona Beach German Shepherd Dog Rescue. Several of my GSD dog club members work with that rescue.
• Email me if you have any questions. There's a "Contact Me" thing on the right side of this page.

Here it is Thoughtless Thursday, and I'm asking you to think. Again! Thank you Ruckus the Eskie, M.K. Clinton and the pups over at Love is Being Owned by a Husky for letting me link up nonetheless. Anyway, this is a hop. Click around below and see what others are thinking -- or not thinking -- about today. TTFN, -- K

I Swear It's True!

From time to time I share my crazy work stories. I swear they're true (seriously, I'm not that imaginative). However, I do change names and identifying facts to protect myself. It's a strange job, but it pays the bills so I'd like to keep it. With that in mind, welcome to my crazy world . . .

 

Not my raccoo

I received a call over the radio. The dispatcher said there was a sick raccoon in the backyard of 1410 State Street. I was met by a young woman. She told me she used to work for a veterinarian, so she knew the raccoon was rabid. I grabbed my catch pole and told her to stay back. When I approached the raccoon I saw that it was missing part of its left ear, had a large scrape on its left side, and the left rear leg appeared to be broken. The poor thing was a mess. I gently scooped it up and put it in a transfer cage. As I returned to my truck the young woman said, "It's lethargic, it walks funny and is out during the day. It definitely has rabies." I told her I thought it was probably hit by a car. She was flabbergasted.

 

I had a woman call last week to report that her cat was missing. She was in a panic. She had recently moved to the area and was afraid her cat didn't know how to get home. I loaned her a trap and suggested she bait it with her cat's favorite food. I gave her some tips and told her not to worry, the cat was probably within a three block radius and I suspected it would show up in the next few days. She was still frantic. She called me everyday and I told her the same thing every time. Long story short . . . The woman called a pet psychic. She spent $80 for the psychic to tell her to put the trap on the next street over and the cat would be back in a couple of days. Guess what, the cat came back. She called me raving about how accurate the psychic was -- never mind that I had told her the same thing . . . for free! Sometimes I think I'm in the wrong profession.

 

Bipolar Betty had two dogs -- a big black one and a big white one. The dogs got out on a Sunday and killed the neighbor's Chihuahua. In the dead of night, Betty drove her dogs three states away before the incident was reported the following morning. There was a dispute as to which dog killed the Chihuahua. All the witnesses said it was the black dog. Betty swore it was the white one. She refused to let me see the dogs. She even refused to show me pictures and instructed he vet not to speak to me. We went round and round. Lawyers got involved. Ten days into the investigation she said that her dogs had different bite patterns, so what I needed to do was dig up the dead Chihuahua and compare the wound to her dogs' mouths . . . uh, no. And if even we had agreed to her outrageous request, she said she was not bringing her dogs back to Florida, so I had nothing to compare the wounds to anyway.

 

This is a real toy, and yes, I own one.
I named mine after a local hoarder.

A woman called me at 10 AM saying that she was moving and had to get rid of her cat. She asked if I would take it. When she gave me her address, I realized she was about 5 miles outside of my city limits. However, she was about 20 miles away from the County shelter. I told her that I had one empty cage (I only have 5 cages total) and a pickup scheduled for the following morning. I made a deal with her: if she brought me the cat by 5 PM I would take it. Not only would this save her the trip, but it would save her about $75 in fees. She said that she didn't have a car and asked if I would come get it. I told her no. My truck is on GPS (so the boss knows when I leave my jurisdiction) and technically she does not qualify for my services. I was doing this as a favor and on the down low because I was not suppose to use City resources for people who don't pay City taxes. I told her that the offer expired at 5 PM, at which time I had to notify the County what they were picking up the following day. Otherwise, she needed to take her cat the County shelter between 8 AM and noon Tuesday through Friday, and pay the surrender fee plus no vaccination and no county tags penalties. (I don't charge those fees.) Well, no good deed goes unpunished. Not only did she not bring me the cat, she also called and complained. Twice. I've been told to stop being nice to people. I've never been accused of being too nice before. I don't know how to handle this.

Yes, these are real stories. I have a hundred more, all equally bizarre. Some days I think I'm trapped in a Twilight Zone episode. Other days I just drink.

In honor of Thoughtless Thursday I'm going to stop thinking about my crazy job before I go insane. Thanks Ruckus the Eskie, M.K. Clinton and the pups over at Love is Being Owned by a Husky for giving me a safe place to vent. When you're done with my insanity, click around below to see what others are thinking about (or not thinking about) today. -- K

 

Just What I Asked For

I've mentioned before that Hubby and the kids have nicknamed Jedi "Kelso." Like the That 70's Show character, Jedi is a pretty boy who often does dumb things. Sometimes, however, I suspect my dog is a lot smarter than my family thinks. And other times I'd swear he understands every word I say.

 

Jedi has never been a cuddly dog. I know he loves me, and he's demonstrative with his affection, but it's usually just a quick lick, a goofy grin or a bump-n-wag. He never stays still for loving more than a minute or two before wriggling away. I guess that's just who he is and I don't want to force him to do something he's uncomfortable with.

 

Dozer, Jedi's brother

About a month ago I went to visit my friend Blondie. Jedi's brother, Dozer, lives with Blondie and her family. I was sitting on the love seat chatting away when Dozer suddenly climbed up and put his head in my lap. He stayed that way for the longest time. I was so amazed that I snapped a picture of it with my phone. It's an unflattering picture of me, so I'm not going to show it to you. However, I did show it to Jedi when I got home, saying something akin to "Look what your brother does! I'd really like it if you'd do that too." He gave me a goofy grin and bounced off.

 

Fast forward to last week. I came home early with a sore back. I went to bed and figured it would be better in the morning. It wasn't. It was worse. But stubborn me still waited several days before going to the doctor -- just in case it got better by itself. (BTW, I'm not real fond of going to the doctor.) By the time I got an appointment I was in excruciating pain taking all the old painkillers I could find in the medicine cabinet. My backache turned out to be a kidney/bladder infection. OUCH. The doctor prescribed antibiotics and better pain meds, along with instructions to stay in bed and rest. Here's the amazing part: Jedi never left my side. When I was in bed, he cuddled up beside me for hours at a time. When I was on the couch, he was next to me resting his head on my leg. And when I was on the floor crying in pain, he was laying over me, licking the tears from my face. My snuggle-free dog turned into the biggest cuddle bunny I've ever seen . . . just what I had asked for.
 

Jedi -- see the family resemblance?

Alas, it was short lived. Now that I'm on the mend Jedi has returned to his old ways. He still follows me room to room -- he is a shepherd after all -- but he keeps watch from a distance, with the occasional quick lick or bump-n-wag to say hello.

 

Now that I'm feeling better I've got some blogs to catch up on. I missed you guys! And hopefully a few posts of my own will come along shortly. I discovered that it's hard to be creative while in pain. I also discovered that you can find an episode of Law and Order and/or Law and Order: SVU on TV any time of the day or night. Who knew?

Despite my tale of the thoughtful thing Jedi did for me, it's Thoughtless Thursday! We're joining Ruckus the Eskie, M.K. Clinton and the pups over at Love is Being Owned by a Husky and all the folks below to share what thoughts are -- or aren't -- in our heads today. Check it out! -- K

 

Time For a Career Change?

The other day I realized that I have been an animal control officer for over 10 years. 10 YEARS! Lately I've discovered little idiosyncrasies that might indicate it's time for me to do something else.

• My memory is strangely selective. There are residents that I see regularly. I can remember the names of all the dogs, but can't seem to remember the names of the people.


• However, if someone was a jerk to me not only do I remember his name but everything else associated with him -- address, the car he drives, where he works and every ugly word that fell out of his mouth.


• My work clothes get more use than anything else in my closet.


• Whether I like it or not, certain smells are ingrained in my brain:
• I can smell an embedded collar from 10 yards away.
• I can accurately detect Parvo with my nose alone.
• I can walk past someone in Walmart and tell that she's a hoarder.
• I can differentiate dog pee from cat pee and human pee. (Sadly, this has come in handy.)


• I have called my family on the way home and had them put my robe in the laundry room so that I could wash my uniform right away without walking through the house.

Not the balls we're talking about buddy!

Apparently I notice -- and comment on -- unneutered dogs while driving. My sons have said "Mom, please quit looking at dogs balls!" more times than I can count.

Animal Cops has been banned in my house. I get frustrated and yell at the TV, telling the ACOs to quit playing it up for the camera and use their safety equipment.

I am a vinyl glove connoisseur. Seriously, latex is for rookies.

• What’s that cologne I'm wearing? Adam's Flea Spray!


• I have a deep-seated distrust of all Chihuahuas.


• I eat more meals in my work truck than I do at the kitchen table. I even have a stash of plastic forks and extra straws in the glove box.


• I point out unleashed dogs in my friends' Facebook photos.

You see cheap nylon leashes, I see the ultimate multi-tool!

• I have done things with a nylon slip lead that would make MacGyver jealous.


• My colleagues and I have shared gruesome case details and photos over lunch. They didn't ruin our appetites, but the eavesdroppers behind us were a little queasy afterwards.


• I did the math: I have over 4000 hours of beach driving experience. I'm an excellent driver, yet I still have nightmares about running over children buried in the sand.


• I have walked into a room and said "Oh God, what's that horrible smell?!" only to discover that it was me.


• I have 12 veterinarians, eight ACOs, four shelters, three wildlife rescues, Rabies Control, Fish & Wildlife, a pet crematorium and an at-home euthanasia service programmed into my cell phone. In comparison, I have seven family members in the same phone.

It's Thoughtless Thursday, and as usual I am thinking too much! But Ruckus the Eskie, M.K. Clinton and the pups over at Love is Being Owned by a Husky let me link up anyway. Thanks guys! Anyway, once you're finished with my nonsense, click around and see what others are thinking -- or not thinking -- about today. -- K

From the Phone Log

I have a phone log at work. I record all the phone calls that come into the office including names, dates, times, addresses, when the call was returned, the nature of the call and any notes about the conversation. I use Excel spreadsheets because they're convenient and searchable. FYI: That log has saved my butt several times. I'm not saying that residents lie -- but several have over-exaggerated and/or omitted information when lodging complaints to my boss. I know! Not only do the logs keep me informed and protect my heinie, they can also be entertaining. Sometimes the messages left on my machine are down right hysterical. Here are some of my favorites from the past few months. As usual, it's all true, but I have changed addresses and street names to protect the innocent ME! Enjoy.

• Caller wants to report a kitten that was hit and killed on Mayfield Road earlier today. It's before you get to the little park on the right. She doesn't know what street that is but wants to know if somebody picked it up. Kelley's Notes: Mayfield Road is 10 miles long and crosses two jurisdictions. The caller didn't leave a name or phone number so I couldn't get any additional information. I haven't received any other calls, so I'm assuming it's either gone or not on our part of Mayfield Road.


• Caller thinks there is something living in the storm drain on the corner of Davis and Petunia because his dog won’t leave it alone when they go for a walk. He wants to know if I'm brave enough to stick my face in the hole and take a look. Kelley's notes: I am not. Whatever is there will have to stay there.


• Caller saw our "found dog" ad on Craigslist. She wants to know if it's hers. She is missing an intact red-nosed pit bull, male. He's been gone since March (two months), thinks he got out through a hole in the fence. No microchip, she doesn't believe in those. No collar, dog "never leaves the yard." Kelley's notes: It's not her dog. Our dog is a female Chihuahua mix. BTW, the ad has a picture.


• Caller saw a "malnutritious puppy" on Franco Street. Kelley's notes: Good thing we don't eat dog! Seriously, patrol area and look for a skinny dog.


• A woman has a stray cat that has been hanging around for years; they "kind of adopted him." The cat has started acting up, scratching people and dogs walking by her house. She's looking for advice before deciding whether or not to euthanize the cat. Kelley's notes: I suggested having a vet rule out any medical issues before euthanizing. The cat could be in pain and acting out to keep from getting hurt. She said she hadn't thought of that. You're welcome kitty!


• The dogs at 1401 Adams bark at the garbage men on Thursday mornings. The neighbor at 1399 yells, screams and bangs on fence at the dogs. Caller works nights and wants everybody to "just shut the fuck up" so he can get some sleep. Kelley's notes: Contact dog owner and suggest dogs be contained inside the house on Thursday mornings between 8 and 10.


• A squirrel fell into her pool. She fished it out and wants to know what to do with it. It's breathing but not moving. She doesn't know if it's "brain dead or just resting." Kelley's notes: When I called back she stated that the squirrel had gotten up and ran away. I'd guess it was just resting.


• Ducks keep flying into his pool. They show up around 5:30 every night. Kelley's notes: ??


• There is a dead cat on Cedar Drive. The vultures are eating it. "It looks like the Serengeti over here!" Kelley's notes: LOL!


• There's a stray gray pit bull at the Villas. The dog is very friendly, but he keeps attacking leaf blower. The lawn guy can't finish and we pay him by the hour. Kelley's notes: I picked up the dog. He was very friendly.


• The neighbors are letting their cat out and it's attacking everybody else's cats. They won’t get it fixed. She thinks the other neighbor, Larry, will hurt the cat. She wants something done right away. She'll do whatever it takes. Kelley's notes: 20 minutes later she called back saying she changed her mind and doesn’t want to get involved. Larry is her son’s father. Please don’t do anything, and don’t say anything to the neighbors about the cat. She doesn’t want any trouble.


• Caller says there's an opossum outside her window during the day. She thinks it has rabies. Kelley's notes: I told her not to worry. It's not uncommon for opossums to be out during the day. I also told her that an opossum's body temperature is too low to support the rabies virus. It's not rabid. She told me I was lying.


• Ms. Taylor says that something is digging holes under her house. It's agitating her dogs and they're keeping her up all night. She's frustrated. If she catches it can she kill it? Kelley's notes: I gave her the number to the Florida Wildlife Commission and told her that it was illegal to discharge a firearm in the city limits.

As I've said before, this job is seldom boring. I couldn't make up anything this bizarre if I tried.

It's Thoughtless Thursday! Click around and see what others are thinking -- or not thinking -- about today. -- K

If You're on the Fence, Get a Lab

OR Why You Should Reconsider Getting a GSD

 

A few weeks back a woman on Google+ had posted pictures of a Labrador retriever puppy and a German shepherd puppy side-by-side stating "I can't decide, what do you think?" My stomach jumped into my throat. After several minutes of editing my response, I posted something like:

German shepherds and labs are two entirely different breeds. They think and train differently. I have GSDs. They're smart and funny and incredibly loyal, but they're not a breed for everybody. You have to keep them mentally stimulated. They don't do well left alone at home all day. If you don't have the time and energy to train and exercise them they can become destructive, aggressive and dangerous. If you're on the fence, get a lab. PM me if you'd like to discuss this further.

Sadly, I never heard from her. I shared this with my GSD friends and they all thought it made perfect sense. Even my ACO friends "got" what I was trying to say. However, my non-dog friends (yes, I have some of those!) were confused and thought I was dissing labs. That was not my intention! So let's try again, ok?

There's a reason the Labrador retriever has been the most popular dog in America for the past 24 years. They're athletic and playful, easygoing and trusting, and usually friendly with children, other pets and even strangers. Because of this, they make horrible guard dogs.

There's also a reason why German shepherds run a close second in popularity. Described as strong, intelligent, obedient and highly trainable, German shepherds are probably the most versatile breed of dog. Originally bred to herd sheep, they're also used by military, police and search-and-rescue groups. They're both fierce protection dogs and thoughtful service dogs.

Here are a few differences. (Yes, I know these are generalities and you will always find an exception.)

• Labs are friendly and people oriented. They seem to love everybody. Strangers are just friends they haven't met yet. German shepherds are guarded and aloof. They love their people, but strangers are judged and must be deemed worthy before touching them. Warning: not everybody passes the test.
• Labs were bred to have soft mouths so they wouldn't maim the ducks. German shepherds are used as protection, military and police dogs because they DON'T have a soft bite. In fact, tests have shown that German shepherds have a stronger bite than pit bulls. (Here's a video. The data is interesting, but I don't like the commentary/speculation of the narrator. We can discuss his "dumb-assery" in the comments if you'd like.)
• A lab is a retriever. They will play fetch with you until your arm falls off. Shepherds get bored with this game if you don't switch it up. After a few throws my GSDs will walk away with the ball because you're obviously incapable of holding on to it.

And my personal observations:

Jedi, worth every frustration

• I have seen many insurance companies, apartment complexes and homeowners associations refuse to insure/allow German shepherds. I have never seen one refuse a lab.
• The USPS chose to use a GSD for their anti-dog bite campaign. (And it pissed me off too! See rant here.)
• I've had dozens of people tell me that they were afraid of GSDs, often saying "I was bitten by a German shepherd as a child." I haven't heard similar comments about labs.
• In my decade as an animal control officer I've had numerous complaints of aggressive GSDs, and have seen several legally declared "dangerous." I've only had a couple of complaints about labs, though often they are lab mixes. I've seen ONE lab declared dangerous.

So why do I love a breed that can be so difficult? That's a good question. Probably because they are difficult. It's almost like you have to earn a German shepherd's love and respect. But once you have it . . . ahhh. I have the most loyal companion, the most dedicated protector, the smartest, the most beautiful, most devoted friend I can imagine. For me, it's worth the work. I'm not dissing labs (or beagles, or Chihuahuas, or mixed breeds or any other dog out there). Dogs are awesome. I love dogs. But for me, my heart will always belong to a German shepherd. And if you're going to bring one into your life I want you to do so with your eyes wide open!

I have friends who are as fiercely loyal to their breeds of choice. How about you? Is there a breed that tugs at your heartstrings harder than all the others?

It's Thoughtless Thursday! I'm joining Ruckus the Eskie and co-hosts Love is being owned by a Husky and M.K Clinton as we

"Don't think, just link!" 

Click below to see what others are NOT thinking about today. -- K

Temperament Test, Take 2

This Saturday in Alpharetta is going to be busy. I got my confirmation letter on Monday. There are going to be 73 German shepherds at this show. SEVENTY-THREE! I think the most I have ever seen at one show was 30. I am overwhelmed.

Does Jedi have this kind of self control?

Along with two specialty shows, Jedi and I are taking a temperament test. The German Shepherd Dog Club of North Georgia is bringing in official German Shepherd Dog Club of America evaluator in from Virginia to test our dogs. Passing dogs get a title (TC); failing dogs just make a nice donation to the club. I've only seen this test done twice in the 10 years: once at another club's show in Orlando, and again last year when the German Shepherd Dog Club of North Florida flew in the same evaluator. We were set up to take the test then, but shit happened and we were deemed ineligible. The test is given so infrequently that it was the deciding factor to do the Alpharetta shows. Cross your fingers!

 

So what exactly is this temperament test I want to take so badly? It's the official GSDCA assessment of a dog's reactions to certain situations. Jedi's tests will include:

• Unusual footing: Jedi will be asked to walk across a tarp and a piece of chain link fencing on the ground. Will he balk?
• Sudden noises: Someone will rattle a can behind a blind. Another will crack an agitator whip. Will Jedi check it out? Will he cower? (Usually someone fires a starter pistol, but since a horse show will be going on at the same time we're testing, the Equestrian Center has asked that we not fire a gun. Horses can be skittish.)
• Scary objects: A large umbrella will be opened at Jedi and then dropped to the ground. Will he spook? Will he recover and investigate the umbrella?
• Neutral stranger: Someone Jedi doesn't know will walk up to me and have a conversation, ignoring the dog. This one doesn't worry me.
• Friendly stranger: Another person Jedi doesn't know will come up to us and touch Jedi. THIS one worries me! (Sometimes he's an ass.)
• Threatening stranger: Wearing a floppy hat, sunglasses and trench coat, a bat wielding stranger will come up and make "threatening overtures." Will Jedi attempt to protect me? Will he try to eat the bad guy?

So what is the evaluator looking for? Below is a description of the ideal GSD temperament according to the German Shepherd Dog Club of America (our parent club and keeper of the breed standard):

"The breed has a distinct personality marked by direct and fearless, but not hostile, expression, self-confidence and a certain aloofness that does not lend itself to immediate and indiscriminate friendships. The dog must be approachable, quietly standing its ground and showing confidence and willingness to meet overtures without itself making them. It is poised, but when the occasion demands, eager and alert; both fit and willing to serve in its capacity as companion, watchdog, blind leader, herding dog, or guardian, whichever the circumstances may demand. The dog must not be timid, shrinking behind its master or handler; it should not be nervous, looking about or upward with anxious expression or showing nervous reactions, such as tucking of tail, to strange sounds or sights. Lack of confidence under any surroundings is not typical of good character."

Dear Jedi, don't be this dog!

Even though this is set up by the German Shepherd Dog Club, dogs of other breeds are welcome to take the test. The first time I saw the test there were several Labrador retrievers in the mix. When it came time for the gun fire, all the German shepherds turned around and looked to see where the shots came from. The labs, however, all looked up. I was confused until the owner told me that they were hunting dogs and were waiting for the bird to fall.

I have NO idea how well Jedi will do. But don't worry, I'll tell you either way. I'm hoping that I can find someone to take pictures too. Anyway, wish us luck! (And if you happen to be in Alpharetta this Saturday, please stop by the Equestrian Center and say hi. I could use a friendly face. I am so out of my league this weekend.)

P.S. It's Thoughtless Thursday! Obviously I'm overthinking this weekend. Hop around below and see what others are thinking -- or not thinking -- about today. -- K

 

Alpharetta Bound

Well, we're going to try it again. Last week I sent in the entry form for two more conformation shows. This time we're going to Alpharetta, Georgia (just outside Atlanta). The German Shepherd Dog Club of North Georgia is hosting two Specially Shows in June. Just like German Shepherd Dog Club of North Florida shows last month, both shows are going to be held on one day, one AM and one PM. It's all German shepherds, all day! Cross your fingers we do well. Also, they're offering the temperament test that Jedi and I missed out on last year.

 

Dear Judge, Pick this one!

This will definitely be the farthest that we have ever traveled for a dog show. I'm a bit nervous. Jedi is not a fan of car rides (seriously, what's up with that?) and I'm worried that my old Expedition won't make it there and back. It's been kind of squirrely lately, and I haven't had the time (or money) to get it looked at. I had thought I was going with a friend but those plans fell through. So tomorrow -- in between errands, chores and various social obligations -- I need to check out hotels and rental cars and see if I can find Hubby's travelling mechanic friend. UGH. There are just not enough hours in the day.

So, wish us luck. I promise to keep you updated. And if any of you happen to be near the Wills Park Equestrian Center in Alpharetta on June 6th, come by and say hi. I'd love to see a friendly face. See you at the dog show! -- K

Hey, it's Thoughtless Thursday! (And yet Kelley can't stop thinking --typical.) Hop around below and see what others are thinking -- or not thinking -- about today.